Musings on Bioderma

Almost as long as I’ve been aware of the existence of the beauty community, I’ve been aware of the existence of Bioderma. However, I never felt the burning urge to try it, but it so happened that whilst on holiday in Paris my sister had the presence of mind to suggest a bottle as a little gift for me – naturally, I was busy slaving away at uni and not present on said jaunt. Consequently, I found myself in possession of a product whose hype had never sucked me in per se, but I was mildly curious about. This is not a review – no one needs to read a bona-fide ‘review’ of Bioderma, but these, are my thoughts.

I don’t understand how you can ‘love’ Bioderma, by the same token that I don’t understand how you can ‘love’ breathing, or the Tube network, or a scouring pad. They’re there, and they’re useful, and you may be inconvenienced by a lack of them, but they are fundamentally not loveable. Granted, Bioderma does a job (removing my mascara) and it does it well, but my mascara comes off anyway because I’m partial to cleaning my face properly (a virtuous wench, me). So all that Bioderma is really enormously useful for is when I want to take my makeup off in the middle of the day and put some more on, which happens about twice a year. I am not exciting enough to require multiple faces of makeup in the same day.

So I can see how Bioderma must be utterly necessary to professional MUAs, and no doubt they are ridiculously grateful for its existence, but that doesn’t explain why a host of Youtubers and bloggers continue to rhapsodise on its many wonders. Surely they’d get precisely the same effect from cleaning their face? I’m not saying that it doesn’t do the job brilliantly, but I’m saying that for most of us it’s not a job that requires doing. And oh my stars, don’t get me started on the people who treat it as a cleanser. Ladies, a dispersion of micelles in a solvent does not a cleanser make. Wash your damn faces. I hope Caroline Hirons would be proud, because I am representin’!

Here ends the musing.

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